Category Archives: Movies

Sep 16 2012
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Movies

End of Watch: Bald Jake Gyllenhaal?

We are complete suckers for crime dramas, Anna Kendrick, and Jake Gyllenhaal, so when we first heard of the new movie End of Watch we were really excited! Then we saw the trailer and became… less excited? We are not sure exactly what it is about this trailer that makes the movie seem less appealing. Maybe it’s because it reminds us of the movie Savages. Which yes, we saw. Unfortunately. Perhaps it’s because it looks like someone decided to make a movie of “The Shield” without Michael Chiklis. Perhaps it’s because Jake Gyllenhaal, even bald, is still too pretty to be a believable badass cop. But the most likely reason is that the trailer, while using a documentary style technique does not make any of the characters look particularly real – it’s simply the ‘good guys’ vs. the ‘evil Mexican cartel.’ After years of watching crime dramas with morally questionable policemen and criminals like “The Shield” or “The Wire” … honestly this movie looks kind of flat and boring.

Trailer Summary:
So the trailer opens with these two awesome cops who are partners and best friends! [Insert family scenes here.] And then we learn that they somehow stumbled upon this cartel. And now the cartel wants to kill them. Conflict ensues. Also the guy who wrote Training Day and The Fast and the Furious wrote it.

Sounds good right? Buuuut, we have our doubts.

Problems We Have With It:

  • Jake Gyllenhaal and Michael Peña have great chemistry, but they seem too good to be true. They are the “city’s TOP GUNS.” The capitalization is not an accident folks. They are just that good. However, the awesome crime dramas we prefer tend to have characters that are flawed but still likable for some reason. Michael Chiklis’ Vic in “The Shield” or Dominic West’s McNulty from “The Wire” are so much more interesting.
  • Note that the villain in the movie is simply referred to as “The Cartel.” Hmmmmmmm.
  • It is a ridiculously macho looking movie.


Now perhaps when it comes out, this movie will prove us completely wrong and show us a complex picture of crime in America. However, it looks like a Bourne-type action flick masquerading as a more provocative ‘film.’ We might see it when it comes out September 21. But then again… we might just re-watch some of “The Shield” instead.

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Sep 12 2012
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Movies

Celeste and Jesse Forever: Romantic and Hilarious

As you might have already extrapolated from previous posts, we are NBC devotees. Yes, we recognize that our eisre for a network to succeed is not actually rational. But nevertheless, we sense the spirit at NBC and by association love its many talented actors and actresses–particularly those in comedies.

So obviously, we were super pumped when we saw that Rashida Jones (The Office, Parks and Recreation) and Andy Samberg (Saturday Night Live) were starring in a movie together! Better yet, we saw the trailer and were genuinely excited to see Celeste and Jesse Forever. Rom-coms are obviously our jam, especially when they are written by women! Yes, Rashida Jones actually co-wrote Celeste and Jesse Forever, allowing us to hope that the movie would at the least have more three-dimensional characters than in your average rom-com.

On that front, our hopes were not disappointed in the least. All of the characters felt fully fleshed-out and like people that you could meet in your everyday life. We especially loved Elijah Wood as Celeste’s best gay friend who tries and fails to be sassy. Even when we were frustrated with Jesse and/or Celeste, we were rarely asking “Why would they do that??”

We were pleasantly surprised by the direction that the movie took–one that we hadn’t anticipated from watching the trailers. The setup for Celeste and Jesse is that Celeste and Jesse got married very young, grew apart, and decided to divorce but remain best friends. While we found that a super interesting dynamic to explore, we weren’t sure it could carry an entire movie. Don’t worry–it isn’t asked to. As much as anything, the movie is really about Celeste and Jesse each finding their paths to actually growing up.

Celeste and Jesse Forever was both adorable and hilarious–as well as making us cry at one point. Go support women in filmmaking and see this movie–and spend time with the delightful Rashida Jones and Andy Samberg. It’s a win-win situation, people!

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Sep 09 2012
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Movies, THINGS WE LOVE

The Master: guys just go see it

Okay, guys, the previously retired actor JOAQUIN PHOENIX is back. In a movie about a CULT. How awesome is that? How much more do you need to know to want to see this movie??? If unconvinced, watch the trailer below!

MIND BLOWN. And that’s just the trailer. Imagine how great the movie will be! Some of the many awesome things about this trailer:

  • JOAQUIN PHOENIX IS IN A MOVIE AGAIN. It’s actually him!
  • The director. Guys – Paul Thomas Anderson is kind of amazing. Not only did he direct the epic There Will Be Blood, his long term partner is Maya Rudolph from SNL. He’s a winner.
  • Paul Thomas Anderson said that Phllip Seymour Hoffman’s character is loosely inspired by L. Ron Hubbard, the founder of Scientology. Phillip Seymour Hoffman + Scientology??? We are intrigued.
  • Jesse Plemons is in this movie! Obviously if a movie has any actor from “Friday Night Lights” in it, we’re going to see it. But ESPECIALLY Landry. We love Landry!
  • Also, Phillip Seymoure Hoffman looks AMAZING in it. We would probably join his cult…
  • Amy Adams – always a plus. Ever since the The Muppets we are totally on the Amy Adams bandwagon.


Just in general this movie looks so. good. This is one of those movies where everything seems to come together and a truly unique and amazing movie is made. WE ARE SO EXCITED. EVERYONE SHOULD SEE THIS MOVIE.

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Sep 05 2012
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Movies, Music

Sparkle: Only For You, Whitney

When we first saw the trailer for Sparkle, we could not have been more excited. Whitney Houston’s last on-screen appearance! A plot that looked a lot like Dreamgirls! What more could you want in a movie?

Well, as it turns out… kind of a lot. We sat through that movie, and it was mostly long and boring.

The biggest problem with Sparkle? The title character is easily the most boring person involved in the entire movie. Here, let us describe the major characters for you:

  • A former alcoholic/druggie/singer who has become an upstanding member of society. She is mother to three daughters, owns a dressmaking shop and her own home, and is a pillar of her church community.
  • Whitney Houston’s eldest daughter, who has moved back home after a failed marriage. She’s approaching 30 in an era where that means death in the marriage market but is exceptionally pretty and can really put over a song. Though she’s sometimes over-focused on material things, she cares deeply for her sisters.
  • The second daughter, who is crazy smart and plans to go to medical school. She is only interested in a singing group because it would help her pay for med school. She does cool, unconventional things like shaving her head.
  • The youngest daughter, whose only characteristics are “good girl” and “likes writing songs.”

Yes, as you might have guessed, the last one is Sparkle. Also named Sparkle, which seems unlikely considering that her sisters go by “Sister” and “Dolores” and their mother is vehemently opposed to their vanity. What?

So everyone in it was fine. It was great to see Whitney sing “His Eye Is On the Sparrow” and all. Carmen Ejogo, who played Sister, was awesome. Jordin Sparks did what she could with what she had. Everyone sounded great. We just kind of kept wishing that the movie was much, much shorter and/or had far more musical numbers.

That being said: we’re glad we paid to see Whitney’s last movie role. She really was a once-in-a-generation talent, and hearing her voice truly reminded us of that. If nothing else, Sparkle just reminds us all how Whitney can make even something dull shine.

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Sep 02 2012
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Movies

The Words: Say What?

Ok, so when we saw the trailer to this movie we were just like… what? The music and copious typewriter shots indicate that this movie should be artsy and good and like… really get to the HUMAN EXPERIENCE YOU KNOW!? But somehow it just falls short and looks kind of boring. Watch the trailer below to witness the confusing blandness that is The Words.

Things that Continue to Confuse Us

  • The cast: Bradley Cooper, Dennis Quaid, Olivia Wilde, Zoe Saldana and Jeremy Irons are all pretty famous people. What are they doing in this movie?
  • 0:32 – J.K. Simmons returns playing the role of The Mean Editor again. We got really excited for a moment that this might actually be a Spiderman movie! Alas… Tobey Maguire never showed up…
  • 0:38 – Zoe Saldana, the love of Bradley Cooper’s life in the movie shows up wearing a FEDORA. We do not support Fedoras. Ever. Do you really want to tell your children, “When I first met your mother, she was wearing a Fedora…”? NO. UNACCEPTABLE.
  • 1:16 – Bradley Cooper finds a mysterious manuscript in a briefcase that is sitting in the open on a shelf that literally anyone could find and see. Come on. No secret compartment? Is this real life?
  • 1:42 – Jeremy Irons, the ‘actual’ writer of the best selling manuscript shows up, in cinema super-spy/drug dealer style on a park bench wearing a trench coat and… A FEDORA. We cringed.
  • The trailer then ends with emotional music and a series of really vague statements that are actually a list of MIND BLOWING EPIPHANIES:
    • “Some dreams test us”
    • “Some stories connect us”
    • “Some moments change us”
    • “Some choices stay with us”
    • [insert dramatic pause]
    • “FOREVER”


Wow. Why are there so many fedoras? Why are so many good people in this movie? Are we missing something? Why is this movie being made? We have so many questions! As usual, we resorted to Google / imdb.com to help answer some questions but it just got even more confusing! The Writer / Directors of this movie are both new to this. Brian Klugman’s imdb.com profile indicates that he is a relatively successful actor with many small roles in television shows and some big movies. He has never directed anything else before and neither has his co-director and writer, Lee Sternhal. How in the hell did they get to direct a big movie with such a star studded cast? What on earth? We are intrigued. Almost enough to even go see this movie! Almost. In reality we will probably just take a pass and see Finding Nemo 3D instead.

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Aug 26 2012
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Movies, THINGS WE LOVE

Taken 2: Kidnapping is Still Bad Guys

Guys, Liam Neeson has finally answered all of our prayers by making a sequel to the movie Taken, titled….wait for it…..Taken 2! Now we don’t know about the rest of you, but the moment we saw this trailer we rejoiced. Out of all the bad movies Liam Neeson has found himself in the last few years (Batman Begins being the exception), Taken is definitely our favorite. Liam Neeson may seem an unlikely action star, but we absolutely LOVE watching him kick ass to save his daughter from evil human traffickers. Basically, Liam Neeson is kind of the best and we’d rather watch Taken over James Bond any day. (Sorry folks, it’s true – no disrespect to 007 intended.)   

Now as many of you know, sequels are always iffy because they bring up the question: ‘Will the director totally change the plot / invalidate a lot of the first movie?’ For example, after Ocean’s Eleven, a movie about how eleven people pulled off a truly incredible heist successfully, they decided to make Ocean’s Twelve, a movie about how they weren’t actually that successful because Andy Garcia figured out who robbed him and wants his money back. They then have to go rob some folks in Europe to get his money back. Whoops. Seriously, don’t try to pull one on Andy Garcia. However, we don’t have to worry about that with Taken 2, because based on the trailer they are not changing anything. They actually seem to be making the exact same movie as the first one!!!

Ladies and gentlemen, observe the basic arc of the Taken trailers.

Beginning

  • HUGS: Obligatory hug from daughter in first minute of the trailer, this establishes that they are happy and everything is all good. (0:12 in Taken and 0:40 in Taken 2)
  • HOTELS: Several shots of them being in hotel rooms with lots of windows…. this establishes that they are on vacation. Why are they always on vacation? WHY ARE THEY NEVER AT HOME?


Middle:

  • The Kidnapping: The kidnappers show up and this is where the windows (see: ‘Beginning’) become important. The daughter either watches the kidnapping through the windows or climbs out of one.
  • THE PHONE CALL: Liam Neeson gives instructions to people over the phone, during which he establishes that he is a complete badass and the kidnappers should just give up right now. BUT THEY DON’T. Fools.


End:

  • EXPLOSIONS: Liam Neeson wins. Always.


For more proof see the trailers below:

 

Taken

 

 

Taken 2

 

In sum, Liam Neeson knows if it ain’t broke, don’t fix it.

 

 

 

 

 

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Jul 29 2012
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Movies

Step Up: Revolution–We’re Just Here To Dance

 

 

 

 

 

 

Ladies and gentlemen, we saw Step Up: Revolution – and is anyone surprised? Of course not, we see every movie that is expected to be below average. And let us just say, that we, as viewers of the movie (with like 10 other people) were not that surprised either. Step Up: Revolution was pretty much exactly what we expected: awesome dancing, cringe-worthy acting and a questionable plot at best.

So honestly not that much happened that you couldn’t have guessed from the trailer… so our post on that applies here as well, since indeed the plot was as questionable as we guessed. Some of the cast members were better at acting than others… but obviously none of them were that great. Let us present you with a breakdown of the Step Up: Revolution cast!

Ryan Guzman: Ok ladies, this guy is seriously super hot. So he’s got that going for him, but that still doesn’t mean that he is the greatest actor in the world. Here is how he scored in our book:

  • Acting: 6. He was pretty solid as far as acting goes. He even pulled off some pretty cheesy lines, but he was really cast in this role because he is attractive and a great dancer.
  • Dancing: 8. This guy can DANCE. He wasn’t the best dancer in the movie (only because he was next to some truly spectacular dancers). But even more than his dancing, he has charisma as a performer. We really liked all of his dance scenes. Except the awkward beach dance… that was weird.

Kathryn McCormick: So she is the lead, playing this rich girl whose evil father wants to tear down the part of the city where the dancers live. She also manages to fall in love with the lead of a protest dance crew… as you do.

  • Acting: 4. She was generally pretty believable as a rich girl but struggled as someone who would get involved with protesting. Also at one point she called the lead guy “John” rather than his actual name, “Sean.” How did we not edit that out, people??
  • Dancing: 9. Girlfriend can dance. We were particularly impressed that she could manage both the lyrical/modern style that she was supposed to be aspiring to and the more hip-hop influenced style of the crew.

Peter Gallagher: Peter Gallagher and his eyebrows were playing the evil development father, a role that we continue to have problems with because of his past as Sandy Cohen on The O.C., where he frequently opposed his evil father-in-law’s development work. But whatever.

  • Acting: 7. One of the few people appearing in this film who can pull off more than 3 emotions. Unfortunately, the film didn’t want for him to have multiple emotions. Problematic, but he did the best he could and created a character who (although he was supposed to be the villain) was three-dimensional and had a real relationship with his daughter.
  • Dancing: 0. For mysterious reasons, Peter Gallagher did not dance in this movie. It would have been so much more legit if he had.

Misha Gabriel: So Misha Gabriel had the unfortunate job of playing the most unlikable character in the whole movie. His character was a obnoxious, unreasonable, and jealous jerk. He was even more unlikable than the evil developers in the film. We are still getting over his character’s personality, so these might be a little skewed.

  • Acting: 5. To be fair, he was playing a pretty obnoxious and unbelievable character who was so unreasonable it was ridiculous. So maybe it was just the writing.
  • Dancing: 6. We don’t really remember his dance scenes… he wasn’t prominently featured in them so he ranks a 6 – good but not great.

Adam G. Sevani (Moose): Obvi Moose has been a definitive character for the last couple of installments of the Step Up franchise, and they managed to convince him to make a cameo in this one. While this was great, his five minutes on the screen did manage to make him more interesting of a character than any of the ones we’d been watching for an hour and a half. Really?? Why wasn’t he more involved in this movie?

  • Acting: 8. Sevani only showed up for a few minutes, but he has such a grip on Moose that he felt way more like a character we knew and cared about than either of the leads.
  • Dancing: 10. Adam G. Sevani is a super legit dancer, and we were just glad we got to see him to do anything at all. It’s bad when the best dancer in your dance movie only stays for about 5 minutes, though.

All in all, if you like dance movies, go see Step Up: Revolution. This is a dance movie for dance people. We were cracking up through pretty much every scene except the dancing ones because, ladies and gentlemen, the plot and acting are quite questionable. However, the athleticism and artistry of all the dancers is truly amazing – you won’t find better dancing in any other movies this summer.

 

 

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Jul 25 2012
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Movies, Music

Pitch Perfect: Off Key But Mesmerizing

We aren’t going to lie: we watch a lot of crappy movies. We are suckers for anything that involves singing and/or dancing, and Pitch Perfect, a movie about (no joke) an a cappella competition clearly fits the bill here. Additionally, we are strong supporters of Anna Kendrick, even though we don’t fully understand her career choices. Like, “Great, I was just nominated for an Oscar and starred in 50/50 with Joseph Gordon-Levitt, and the Twilight franchise is finally ending! Clearly I should star in a terrible-looking a cappella movie!”

Fortunately Anna Kendrick can relax: Rebel Wilson (the roommate from Bridesmaids) is here to save the day and the movie. We are so excited for Pitch Perfect, y’all, and we aren’t even ashamed of it. Check out the trailer here:

How we can tell we are going to love this movie:

  • “Your official B.U. rape whistle.” Let us just say, we were not handed official rape whistles when we arrived at college. Missed opportunity.
  • Fat Amy calls herself that “so twiggy bitches like you won’t do it behind my back.” When Rebel Wilson shows up, you know good things are coming.
  • That shower scene. Ummm our reaction, were we to be walked in on by some rando in the shower, would NOT be to calmly sing and capitulate to the crazy’s wishes. Clearly, if there was ever a time for the rape whistle, this was it. However, we do like the fact that Anna Kendrick was basically just bullied into joining an a cappella group WHILE IN THE SHOWER. Promising things ahead, team. Also, promising shirtless guy.
  • “Oh, boy, the bad boys of a cappella have just gotten badder!” Everything about that quote is amazing. First of all, the fact that there are bad boys of a cappella is questionable at best. Secondly, “badder” isn’t a word, which really tells you everything you need to know about this movie.
  • The noises Rebel Wilson makes when talking about bikini car washes. Why is she so amazing???
  • Rebel Wilson horizontal running. Basically Anna Kendrick’s character, ostensibly the lead, is a sideshow in her own trailer… because Rebel Wilson just horizontal ran away with this movie.
  • Did Anna Kendrick just interrupt an a cappella version of Hey Mickey? Oh yes. She did. That’s how VITAL singing is to her.
  • “Let’s remix this business!” We’re going to start saying this in our day-to-day lives.
  • “You guys are gonna get pitch slapped so hard, your man boobs are gonna concave.” Rebel Wilson once again, ladies and gentlemen. We are strong supporters of puns.
  • “I sometimes have the feeling that I should do crystal meth, but then I think, mmmm, better not.” GUYS REBEL WILSON IS ROCKING THIS TRAILER SO HARD. She alone is clearly worth seeing this movie for.

Basically, even though Pitch Perfect is clearly going to be… less than perfect, we are seriously so excited for this movie. Singing, dancing, lots of laughs and a little romance… what more could you want in a fall movie? Rebel Wilson? So yeah, perfect.

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Jul 22 2012
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Movies, THINGS WE LOVE

Batman Remains Quality: The Dark Knight Rises

Like everyone else in the world, we went to see The Dark Knight Rises this weekend. And also like everyone else in the world, we had been anticipating this movie for a very long time. Seriously, who hasn’t?? The Dark Knight came out in 2008, and four years without Batman is entirely too long.

Anyway, so we were extremely excited to see it, and we were not at all disappointed. Christopher Nolan did a fantastic job with wrapping up his trilogy. And it was not only Christopher Nolan who did a fantastic job, pretty much every single person in the cast was phenomenal. He may use the same 10 actors in all of his movies, but damn, can they act. We kept waiting for Leonardo DiCaprio to show up but alas (spoiler alert) he did not. :( Here is a brief breakdown of all of the performances from this movie. They were all great!

  • Christian Bale: First things first, we have the Batman. He may be a cray, but Christian Bale is a fantastic leading man and continued to be awesome as Batman. Even though Batman is a super hero, Bale makes him seem more like a tragic hero from an epic Greek play or something… it’s crazy. When you watch this movie it does not feel like a campy superhero franchise (we’re looking at you Avengers), it feels like an intense character drama. Props to Christian Bale for real. No wonder he won an Oscar in 2011, he’s amazing.
  • Joseph Gordon Levitt: We love JGL, so we were never going to be very objective on this one. He was introduced as a new character in The Dark Knight Rises, the cop Blake. We were really concerned that Christopher Nolan was going to make him be the bad guy, but it is impossible for Levitt to ever seem like a bad person. He is just too likable! Anyway, his faith in Batman was incredibly endearing, and he was the character most consistently trying to do the right thing throughout the movie… and JGL did a fantastic job in making us believe every minute of it. Hey, Nolan: You sure you’re done with Batman? Because we would love to watch you make some sequels with JGL. Just throwing it out there.
  • Anne Hathaway: Okay, so everyone was a little dubious when it was announced that Anne Hathaway was going to be playing Catwoman. We can all admit it. But fortunately SHE TOTALLY PULLED IT OFF. Our girl Anne was sexy, strong, and generally awesome, and we were always looking forward to the next time that there was a scene with her. Girlfriend was believably conflicted but still someone worth rooting for. We would totally watch Catwoman spinoffs, for what it’s worth.
  • Tom Hardy: He is unrecognizable in this movie, and not just because he had a giant mask over his face for Bane and a shaved head. Physically he looked like a different person and his acting, despite the mask, was awesome. It is so challenging to act and have half of your face covered – but Hardy took on the challenge and was a terrifying, but believable villain.
  • Marion Cotillard: So obviously she is a fantastic actress in absolutely everything that she’s in, so there’s not that much of a point in telling you that she’s good. Surprise: she was great! We don’t want to give anything away, but we can say that she did well with playing many different emotions/situations throughout the course of the film. One of the nicest things about The Dark Knight Rises is the total lack of a damsel in distress character: both Miranda and Selina are clearly strong women who can get through a crisis with any means necessary.
  • Gary Oldman: Who doesn’t like Gary Oldman? Seriously. He was great! We maybe want to join the police now because of him! Even though he was lying down in a hospital bed for the majority of the movie we were still in awe of him. He’s just kind of the bomb.

In conclusion, this movie is really, really good. We know, you’re shocked. The action is awesome, the plot (minus some holes) is intriguing and there is a serious twist at the end that will take you by surprise! We even paid extra money to see this movie in a fancy theater (a big deal for us, we’re cheap remember) and we can say with certainty, that this film is worth every penny.

 

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Jul 15 2012
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Movies

Tyler Perry Plays… Not Tyler Perry?

Full disclosure: we are fans of Tyler Perry. He is a prolific entertainer who has built an incredibly successful media empire all out of his own characters and creativity. Even if you don’t personally enjoy his work, there is no denying that he is incredibly popular and a creative force–he has primary creative control on almost all of the movies that he’s involved with. So, when we heard that he was going to be acting in a new movie, we naturally had to check it out – especially since he wasn’t directing/writing/producing it! We went to the trailer link expecting a comedy (he’s a great comedian!) and we saw this. Trailer below.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wXtRKrcPwKE

So, okay apparently we should have known that it was based off a James Patterson novel. While we do know that James Patterson is a thriller writer…. STILL. Was this what you expected when you think – oh hey, Tyler Perry has a new movie! It sure wasn’t what we were thinking… but that’s not necessarily a bad thing. Honestly, Tyler Perry looks like he is going to be good in this movie! We never really thought of him as a leading man in a drama – but after this trailer we are intrigued.

It looks like the plot is basically that there’s a serial killer and Tyler Perry is the lead investigator on this case. Then the serial killer starts threatening Tyler Perry and his family personally, and TYLER PERRY DOES NOT MESS AROUND WHEN YOU THREATEN HIS FAMILY. Then there are lots of explosions and shootings and stuff. Tyler Perry’s wife is very pretty and looks like she’ll be a great damsel in distress. Also, Matthew Fox from Lost is in this for some reason. It looks like he’s a bad guy. And not just a bad guy – THE bad guy. We are confused but curious. More importantly: Dr. Cox from Scrubs (actual name: John McGinley) is in this movie. We loved him on Scrubs and miss him a lot, so we’re excited that he’s here!

Basically, this the rare Tyler Perry movie that does not involve him playing a grandmother in drag–so if that’s your problem with him, consider seeing this movie as an opportunity to see that Tyler Perry is genuinely a talented guy in arenas other than comedy! Haters to the left–we think this is going to be very successful, and we are always happy to see studio movies that acknowledge that people who are not white exist in this world–especially when they’re allowed to be leads. Props, Tyler Perry. We are on board and excited to see Cross!

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